Convenience

It may be miles high in the sky, but The Relatively Convenient Store provides the greatest value available for all your favorite luxury goods and family needs. No longer must you spend days hunting and months harvesting your own food. From raw materials to packaged final products, our certified production process is implemented with the utmost pride and tradition. No plucking, skinning, gutting, trapping, picking, fetching, growing, harvesting, processing, raising, farming, curing, pasteurizing, or any other skills are required any longer! The only step for which the customer is responsible is the transport to and from any of our relatively convenient store locations.

Indeed, the number of steps leading up to our front doors exceeds two thousand, but the climb to luxury has never been so simple!  Discover which of our relatively convenient but consistently epic staircases is closest to you, and follow the steps all the way to the top, just beyond the highest cloud. A hanging ladder at the left will take you directly on our plane and to our level of elevation and lead you straight to the store’s front entrance.

Approaching the doors, customers walk down a long hallway lined with framed pictures on either side of the wall. Clearly they are all depictions of the past, illustrating a time before industrialization and technological determinism. Among them are scenes of workers on farms and in fields. Women fetching water from wells shown next to others as they take the dirt road home, buckets hooked on yokes. Native Americans hunt for game which they make use of every bit possible. All these pictures are showing different ways people have had to work to get their food and other resources. The collection of seemingly obsolete lifestyles is aimed towards making a statement about technological determinism and dependence. Are we helpless without technology? How do hard work and physical labor compete with academic achievement as virtues? How convenient will our lives become before luxury becomes a myth? How inconvenient will everything become after having had luxury?

Our associates will be relatively helpful and the most luxurious items will be on the highest shelves available. For a small convenience fee, customers can access any of our stepping stools, all of which are conveniently broken in places that don’t matter. For your convenience, Wi-Fi internet is enabled throughout all the stores, but all the power outlets are either found on the ceiling, or inconveniently, only two-prong connections. We have a customer rewards program in which you can build points and earn prizes, but members will be subjected to doing customer satisfaction surveys by phone, which inconveniently occur only during dinnertime. We accept cash only, but our ATM machine has no fees and works with any bankcard, although it has been out of order for years.

““Sir, I am so sorry about the inconvenience! Believe me, we are absolutely doing everything we can to repair the connection. I understand you came expecting FIRST CLASS service and accommodations, so let me go grab you a couple of those feather pillows normally reserved for the, uh, terminally ill flyers!!”

“I CAN’T believe I can’t check my e-mail until this AIRPLANE lands in 6 hours –… these a*holes advertise having wireless and I was expecting to use to my new tablet to take care of some business and of course it is messed up because some IDIOT didn’t do his job right ? How inconvenient.””

Cigarette Psoitioning

Regulations on cigarette advertising are strict leaving little room for creativity in the advertising department. I am proposing a brand of cigarette which will be positioned to be strictly menthol only.  They will use this to have an aggressive advertising campaign dissing non menthol smokers.  They will be rowdy they will be questionable they will be clever and they will be rude rude rude. They will be humorous.  Now the company ought not suffer due to sales lacking because they don't sell a non menthol cigarettes- because they will. Either give it some green packaging or just sell them in rollyourowsn bags of tobacco so they're more discreet. This is a open market position I think we should take advantage of it and see if we can't push the envelope here on some adult entertainment....& advertising with a brand that could really turn heads .

Power Rangers

The mission is to get children to ask their parents on Q for specific toy Items whence given the toys proper trademark name as they appear in their favorite television shows. Remastered children's television shows which have been merchandised enhance and updatethe programming with closed captioning. Now when a new character appears it's name pops up like a comic strip bubble and things slow down for just a moment the music changes real quick and then the original program continues. This is a perfect opportunity to reach the child when they are startled with words across the screen in addition to the regular intensity of the show. To engage the child when these introductory labels appear on the screen we need to install first the idea of Christmas in the child. This is to prepare them to hopefully associate the new information to the initial exposure of the aural prime. Across the channel anytime a speaker is mentioning helping a friend or doing the right thing , the help a homie jingle will Ringle in and instill the idea that helping out will get yourself what you want in the long run. I will do the dishes for a week for the..... toy.   I will try to keep my room clean if only I could have the ....toy. I'm yours for the afternoon mom if only I could have the toy.   
The second exposure is actually during the childs program during these remastered micro moments which is really all we got. If we threw some oohing & awwwing sound bites in the background that would help. Using a Christmas jingle may not be a bad idea. A condensed high pitch sounding of help out is more along the lines of what I was thinking for the help a homie sound but as an introduction jingle Christmas music that matches maybe a little funky to get the kids to distinguish our sound verses the originals- the traditionals.

Post-It

This is for a postit commercail using an inglorious basterds movie reference. The commercial shows young adults at a bar table playing the game featured in the movie; the scene from the movie is the one set in a basement pub in england when the basterds are in cahoots with the german actress. The commercial actors play the same game, quote the movie, same gender-ratio, but one of the male players is unable to guess his celebrity. He is told the time he has to guess is when the postit note loses its stick. He is ovetwhelmed with hopelessness when he realizes they werr using brand name post it notes.... he knows it will stick forever, and is at a loss coming up with questions

Aldous Huxley

After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music. 

An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex. 


A democracy which makes or even effectively prepares for modern, scientific war must necessarily cease to be democratic. No country can be really well prepared for modern war unless it is governed by a tyrant, at the head of a highly trained and perfectly obedient bureaucracy. 


A belief in hell and the knowledge that every ambition is doomed to frustration at the hands of a skeleton have never prevented the majority of human beings from behaving as though death were no more than an unfounded rumor. 


Beauty is worse than wine, it intoxicates both the holder and beholder. 


Cynical realism is the intelligent man's best excuse for doing nothing in an intolerable situation.
 

Frank Luntz

Words that Work: Its not what people say, its what people hear

“You can have the best message in the world, but the person 

on the receiving end will always understand it through the 

prism of his or her own emotions, preconceptions, 

prejudices, and preexisting beliefs. It's not enough to be 

correct or reasonable or even brilliant. The key to successful 

communication is to take the imaginative leap of stuffing 

yourself into your liste

ner's shoes to know what they are thinking and feeling in the 

deepest recesses of their mind and heart. How that person 

perceives what you say is even more real, at least in a practical 

sense, than how you perceive yourself.” 

“Winners recognize that even when they aren’t physically 

selling a product, they are always selling themselves. Every 

human interaction is an opportunity to connect—and then to 

sell.” 

Ideology and communication more often than not run into each other rather than complement each other. Principle and communication work together. Ideology and communication often work apart. 

A compelling story, even if factually inaccurate, can be more emotionally compelling than a dry recitation of the truth.

Edward Bernays

"The engineering of consent is the very essence of the democratic process, the freedom to persuade and suggest."

Influences/Shoutouts

Slug:POETIC LICENSE TO ILL
Living Legends (Murs, The Grouch, Eligh) : UNDERGROUND CREW WITH POSITIVE MESSAGE AND TIGHT BEATS
MF Doom:RHYMES ON POINT TIGHT SLANG
Del tha Funkee Homosapien: INTRICATE BARS REAL SUBJECT MATTER
Blackalicious : FAST AND FUNKY
Common : CONSCIOUSLY FUNKY
People Under The Stairs: HAVING FUN WITH FLOW
Wu Tang Clan:HIP HOP AS RELIGION
Slick Rick : SMOOTH BROTHER
Aesop Rock : METAPHYSICAL
KrS- ONE: THE TEACHER
Bone Thugs : HARMONIES
Pete Rock and CL Smooth : ALWAYS JAZZY

Princess Biznotch/Royal Glass Bead Treasure Chest BIXCARD

Thus Spake Princess Biznotch Album Cover

Royal Glass Bead Treasure Chest HTML

***CURRENTLY FOR SALE***

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Melsa's FGood

Olive food so much

My bean stalks be raisin up

Yo gurtrude! Throw a quarter on the scale

Ill take every flavor you sell

You see I ache for nutrients

I lose my vibe without my fiber

Which certainly does not promote my health or my style

My flavanoids are overjoyed whenever I indulge 

My recipes light the dull with secrets to fight the bulge

Lettuce drink to health and spice and serving meals with laughter

Pass the ginger, never miss the morning breakfast specials

Born outta the oven, my meals reflect my craft skills

Im like a scientist concocting ratios for real 

creating pears and apples 

cooking crap together till its a meal

Not I know you gotta lunch box,

so open it up and share, i heard you mom hooks it up

ain't no crust because she cares

Germany to Germany - Ratatat

Darcy will you be my angel
Ive been calling you at night
one day we will be together
no more darkness only light


Darcy will you be my angel
Ive been calling you at night
One day we will be together
No more suicidal fright
(23)
She
A girl named Darcy
My sister was a teenager
1.08
She would smile - - trying - - -hiding - -  pain inside
I said Sister come with me and hear my lullaby
(37)
Lets sit by the fire
Show me where it hurts
Such a fragile mind,
Darcy Didn't know her worth
Can you hear me now
Dry your eyes tonight
Tried so hard to heal Her
But she wanted to fly


(52)
Darcy will you be my angel
Help me to survive this life
Can't you see we're not OK now
Life without you isn't right
(59)
Lost and lonely she did suffer
Soon her scars came into sight
We all thought we could protect you
Lift you up and make you right
(66)
Spring came but all her hope and strength had slipped away
The darker side took the reigns and told her end it all today
for good
So she did obey/Chose a place that's safe
Smiled at our father/ From the top of the stairway
So she took those steps/ Prepared her means of death/
Slowly losing breath, This is how my sister left 

God's Bathroom Floor

Head, pressure, senses, clutched
Date, Divinity, wouldn't, fuck
Touched, hazy, God, change
Rush, floor, life, veins

Chorus:
From a head full of pressure rests the senses that I clutch
Made a date with Divinity, but she wouldn't let me fuck
I got touched by a hazy shaded, God help me change
Caught a rush on the floor from the life in my veins

(Slug):
It goes one for the cannabis, and two for your dianoetics
Three for your reasoning, and four for those that try to get it
Five for your love, and six for the stress
And seven for the day that I climbed into this mess

CHORUS

(Slug):
I'm catching ulcers from the child proof lighters
And all these fine tooth biters that keep the wires in my head tighter
I'm tired out by the distances achieved walking in my sleep
Floors got shifted since the high i got a tad too deep
Ask dad to keep cool, I'll call him back as soon as I resume normal
And get out of this bathroom
And call management to seek some reimbursement 
For the nerve ending that burnt from the first hits

CHORUS

(Slug): 
So fuck needles, fuck smoke
Fuck lines that make the sinus choke
Fuck chasers, trails, fuck waves and rails
Fuck hang-overs, fuck hallucinations
Regurgitations, mandatory sentences and UA tracing
Blind my insight and dull the common sense
Give me INHIBITION, kill the superstition and the confidence
Built the tolerance, now it's more that I consume it
When it boards up my room, the world's whores will croon in unison
Unify the eulogy, autopsy pages read euthanasia, I.E., irony
But here I be within a pool of my drool
Sedated, windows dilated, comatose, life overdose
Tell Jacob Miles to keep it wild style
I promise I'll smile
And check the floor, God's got nice tile
Tell Jacob Mile to keep that shit wild style
And I'll smile
And check the floor, God's got nice tile

CHORUS

(Slug):
Head, pressure, senses, clutched
Date, Divinity, wouldn't, fuck
Touched, hazy, God, change
Rush, floor, life...

Values.com !

Note from D

Appeallz

AIDS Story

Drawing with Kraig

Drinking With Kids Inside

What is emotion?

LyfeStory4Fun

MemorylessNation

Empty Spacefall

Meinyez Rhoolss

Row, Row, Rose Ur Byskills

Conceptualization of Public Opinion

MotorSkills of Dopamine Releasing Kills

Abdul's Swahilii

MusicScales

Insanity Gnoates